Fear of public speaking

Last month I met a woman here in Perth who runs her own business consulting firm. She specializes in helping companies and people with their public image. She doesn't work as a PR person masking problems. Instead she trains people how to manage themselves.

As I have gotten to know her, I've been deeply impressed with her approach and her view on people, images, manners, and human behavior. It is clear to me that she is very observant and has given the matter a lot of thought.

We were talking about the issue of public speaking. I personally don't have a problem with it. I'm not great at it. But I have not found myself disabled with fear about it. However, many people do fear it. Even people who you think shouldn't.

Yes, self confidence has a lot to do with overcoming this fear. But her and I were discussing "Why is the fear is there in the first place? Why is it so common? Why is it so strong?" Natalie has given the matter a lot of thought and has come up with her own theory. It makes a lot of sense.

We humans are social animals. When we are matched with most other animals on the planet, we a wimps. We are, pound-for-pound, very weak animals. Most other animals on the planet can out-run, out-swim, out-jump, and out-fight us. Our greatest strength, and the key to our success on the planet, is our ability to work as a group.

We humans simple can not survive on our own. To be part of a group is part of our very being. It is so fundamental that we don't even know how deeply it controls us. To the human animal, the biggest threat to survival is being banished. To be expelled from a group is a death sentence. So the instinct to stay in the group and avoid banishment is very, very strong.

Public speaking puts the person at risk of banishment. It puts them in a position to be judged, and possibly rejected, by others. Of course these days you aren't going to be eaten by a saber-tooth tiger, or starve. But the fear of rejection is just as real.

This overwhelming desire to belong is strong enough to instill an unreasonable fear into seemingly normal and confident people. You don't even know why you are nervous. Why does your stomach tie it self in knots? Why does your pulse rise? Why do you sweat? Why do you feel such dread?

By convincing your subconscious self that you will not die if you fail, you can overcome this fear. It is nothing to be ashamed of. It is perfectly natural and human to feel it. It is your survival instinct kicking in.